Yes, and last indeed: after nearly 9 intense and difficult months, the 29th of December we're flying out of Guatemala. 'Tis true, the original plan was to spend here 10 more months, but things didn't work out as expected, for various reasons:
- Mattia's job, teaching English in the primary school, turned out to be not so relevant as hoped (the real needs are others, even just at educational level, and there wouldn't be much continuity after primary), which together with the strained relationship with the school direction (so badly managed, such a wasted opportunity...) made it impossible to keep working there in 2017;
- without that job we wouldn't have any financial support given that the promises of finding a fund for Elena haven't been met (and with that small salary we were already using savings and donations to make ends meet and enjoy some necessary time outside this area);
- Mattia's new, much more relevant and promising youth project, based on sport games, athletic training and chess, with good attendance and possibilities of development, much appreciated not only by the kids but also by many people in the community, isn't supported at all by the organisation, which is quite disheartening as working with the youth means to tackle the main problem of the area, i.e. gang violence;
- even Elena's job hasn't been properly valued, as they haven't found anybody she could train to continue the projects well and they haven't done anything to make her stay, not finding a salary and not taking into consideration that rejecting Mattia's project would mean to lose her services too, though they were more closely linked with the organisation's activities;
- UPAVIM, though being a good working opportunity for women of a disadvantaged area, isn't really interested in the community's development, as it appeared when we decided to come, which is a big issue for us, as that's what we believe in most and what we hoped we could somehow dedicate us too;
- living on a roof, in two small rooms with bunk beds, with communal kitchen and toilet-shower room, sharing life with young single volunteers (apart from our dear José&Marlene) isn't easy at all for a family, especially when you've got to deal with stress, tiredness and frustrations coming from a hard working environment and two little sons always happy but going through some difficult times due to the awful influence of school and local behaviour style, so 8-9 months are quite enough, for everyone;
- living with volunteers (apart from a month with Fernanda at the beginning and three with J&M at the end) with no great expectations for their job, no vision, no experience in development or knowledge of third world dynamics, isn't very helpful to overcome work-induced stress, so once again 8-9 months are enough, even though the prospect of having J&M with us until June was a positive one;
- maybe it's down to naivety, or to hope, or misplaced trust, or tiredness, but the fact is we didn't look for other options, that is other institutions o people who could support our community projects, so once we realised there was no future for us with UPAVIM we just had to look for flights; a local lady much devoted to the community told us that something could be found through the Catholic church, but we're not sure it would have been a real option and anyway it turned up too late and the other reasons (see below) would have pushed us to come back all the same;
- Michele&Sam have been amazing at integrating (at school - despite bullying and useless teachers - on the roof, with the neighbourhood's kids...), at learning Spanish (by now it's nearly their first language), at accepting the unusual conditions (never terrible but still a bit hard), at enjoying what available as entertainment, but have undergone a good deal on other sides - maybe without always realising - especially at school, for the awfully bad level (which made them lose skills and the ability to concentrate and put effort into learning) and the bad influence of classmates and non-educating teachers, so we couldn't possibly "sacrifice" them for much longer, especially for the sake of projects not as guaranteed as ours, given the little or no support;
- we were thinking of home-schooling them, but it wouldn't be actually feasible due to their parents' schedule, so the only other option would be a high-level school, again not viable for costs, dates (enrolling for 2017 stopped last April) and logistics (over one hour by public transport or expensive taxis, as school buses don't come to our far and dangerous zones);
- after the last two months without salary, our saving were running out and we don't want to have to count even more on our families and church, whom we must thank a lot but don't want to exploit further;
So, we have to leave, which is, despite all these valid-looking reasons, quite sad and very hard, sadder and harder by the day, as the leaving date approaches: we struggled, but we were doing well and if UPAVIM didn't get it, many women of the organisation and many people from outside it keep expressing their strong appreciation, not only those enjoying our services (Elena's patients and Mattia's kids), but even those who simply understand how important and relevant is what we are trying to do. Every positive feedback fills us with joy and satisfaction, but at the same time with regret, as we can't keep working for the local people, with our current projects and other great ideas. M&S are happy to head back go Italy and stay there until the end of the school year (we don't feel like evicting our new tenants so early, it wouldn't be fair) with grandparents and friends, but they're also sad at the thought of leaving, once again too early, all the friends they've made here.
Anyway, we've done what we could, helping some people directly or planting seeds, showing what should be done and how, and most of all we've lived side by side with the least, working for them, which makes us always feel we're doing the right thing, so we leave fully aware we've dedicated 9 months of our family life to a good cause: it might not have been the best choice, but we've taken that step with the best intentions, for the sake of the least, not for us and we surely did some good.
It's been tough, especially for the two adults, who, once again, didn't get it totally right, and for us as a family, quite battered by the tension, but at least it was a relatively short time, so we should be able to recover relatively soon, though it's going to be hard, not being mentally ready to start over again, given that the plans, as to times and satisfaction levels were quite different.
Moreover, we're also leaving with good memories: of the people, the work, the experience of another part of the world, which is always so enriching (especially as it makes up for what the boys went through, so much so that most likely they will have gained more than what they might have lost); we lived in some desperate areas, but we also took in different cultural aspects and wonderful natural and historical sites of Guatemala, which we enjoyed in late November and early December, with the excuse of entertaining GrannyChiara (holiday pictures are coming soon, once we sort them).
P.S. As you might have noticed, among these reasons for leaving shines the absence of the dangers of living in one of the "red zones" of the world's second most violent country: not because we're reckless, but because actually the risks for us are minimal, as violence is quite carefully targeted, for extortion or turf wars, so there's little to fear, as even the boys have understood, accepting it as a terrible fact, awful for the locals but not so dangerous for us, who have always been able to move around freely and safely.
